Stuck in the Mire
Since my last post, I have written twice. This is going to make it challenging to meet those goals I shared last week. I seem to find myself stuck. I would like to blame it on writer’s block. But actually, it is fear.
I am currently in a part of the book that requires me to do research and write about a time, people, and place, I do not know a whole lot about. I am afraid I will use the wrong words. The words will either be not appropriate for the time, or not part of the culture. I am afraid I will describe the people and places inaccurately.
Every time I sit down to write I need to look up something online. Now I have all this data gathered, but if feels unorganized. I cannot decide if I should just plow through the story line and go back later and make it time and place relevant or should I get my data better organized? And here is where I am stuck!
I know that if I succumb to this fear, I will become paralyzed and unable to move forward. I imagine all of you out there can relate to what I am sharing. I would love to hear from you about how you get “unstuck”. In the meantime, let me share with you a short chapter from the book:
CHAPTER 6
“John, where is your driver?” Father Michael asked again. This time John made an effort to respond to Father Michael’s question. “He is at home in his bed I suppose”, John replied. “I didn’t want to wake him at this late hour. Besides, this is a very private matter, and I did not want to involve him.”
Father Michael was becoming more distressed by the moment. This uncharacteristic behavior from John was disturbing. He wanted John to stop talking around the issue and just tell him what the hell was going on. But his gut was telling him that knowing the answer to John’s out of character behavior was not going to be pleasant. He wished he could go back to his prayer chair and pretend that this evening was not happening.
The rain was still coming down quite heavily making the ride even more unpleasant. Father Michael had ridden this road many times and new it well. He estimated that they still had another 10 to 15 minute ride before they arrived at John’s estate. He could not decide if he should continue to push John to tell him why he had summoned him so late in the evening and was dragging him out into the nasty weather or if he should turn back to praying the rosary.
The part of him that was feeling the deep sense of dread told him to continue praying the rosary. Father Michael liked for things to be simple, sometimes to a fault. This personality trait helped him to be the loving and giving man that was expected of a priest, but it also enhanced his tendency to avoid difficult situations.
He always carried his special rosary beads with him no matter what the situation was. His rosary beads were special because they were given to him by his mother when he was received his first communion. She had passed away just 2 months after his ordination. He felt that using these beads was his way of keeping her near him. And this was one of those moments when he wished she were here. She always had such great advice on how to handle any situation.
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